32 Ounces Of Little Green Cross
I decided I too long been going into the forest without a first aid kit. Being dissatisfied with the options on the market I made one up with a trip to the drug store and a lexan bottle. I didn't like the small sizes of ointment and drugs offered in the ready made kits, and felt as though a trillion different sized band-aids was pointless. The lexan bottle should keep everything dry and clean. My kit includes:-2 gauze bandages
-large and small band-aids
-adhesive bandage tape (the roll wouldn't fit through he mouth of the bottle so I re-rolled it around a Tylenol bottle)
-1 oz tube of H2O2 (antiseptic)
-ibuprofen
-acetaminophen
-benezthonium/lidocain ointment (for burns)
-hydrocortisone (rash cream)
-1 ounce triple antibiotic ointment
-chewable pepto
-fake sudafed (in case someone gets the sniffles)
If anyone can think of anything I missed please leave a comment.
posted by nate @ 1:07 PM
12 Comments:
* The sporting editors had also given me $300 in cash, most of which was already spent on extremely dangerous drugs. The trunk of the car looked like a mobile police narcotics lab. We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers and also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls. Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug-collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.
The only thing that really worried me was the ether. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge. And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon.
--"Fear and Loathing"
water cleansing tabs?
and a guide to grammar...ha!
I added tweezers, and I carry a separate water filter, but some iodine tablets might not be a bad idea.
Nobody likes a grammar commandant, biff
I like the chlorine dioxide idea better than the iodine, I think I'll pick some up.
Well I like your kit and the bottle comes in handy. It is always more satisfying to create your own so that you are for sure getting what is useful.
sodium chlorite added.
--eye of newt--
the prior was a quote from Hunter S Thompson. In the old days we used to read books. Can't hold me responsible for the grammar, which doesn't seem that bad to me.
Depends how far you wanna go.
Cocaine is an excellent topical anesthetic. The polar explorer Roald Amudsen used it to perk himself on the way back home. The crystal methadrine from Mexico is supposed to be 92-98% pure now, if you can get the macroscopic crystals. Of the benzodiazaphenes , Valium is probably the best muscle relaxant, Xanax the best for getting to sleep. I would prefer methaqualone here, but that stuff is nearly impossible to access. Aspirin is my favorite non-steroidal anti-inflamatory, also thins the blood, which is good if you have to trek, not so good if you are cut. Morphine is good for serious injury, to keep the vic from going into shock, and to palliate. There are other opiates, I like opium tincture, codeine. Not a big fan of the low-molecular weight synthetics in this group, esp. when far from civilization.
To minimize boredom, I recommend psilocin, cannabis, (good for night vision) and if you can harvest it responsibly, mescaline. I do not recommend synthetics here as they tend to dehydrate/overheat. Stay away from timewarp in the tent, it tends to make one claustrophobic. Prob. want a delta6 preponderant for the day, a delta9 feature during the evenings. Coffee dehydrates, which can be a welcome effect if one's nose is runny.
Ethanol can be okay, tends to dehydrate as well. Something with gads of sucrose, such as figs, can be useful, don't mix (tyrosine-containing) figs with mao-inhibiting hallucinogens.
Adequate preconditioning is useful . One should have a high pain-threshold, callouses, developed aerobic capacity.
Broadening our considerations. . .
Ya want a medium dog out there, well disciplined, not jejune, not senescent. I prefer hybrid dog, its the American way. They are more intelligent and better-tempered.
But you just want the dog to wake you up/ alert you. So you need weapons and associated hardware in order to take care of business, say if raccoons come a sniffin' 'round in the evenings. Do not anguish about this, most wildlife is unemployed anyway.
The crossbow, esp. laser-aided, is an excellent stand-off weapon, if the opponent count is low. If it is high, a streetsweeper is good. For intermediate opponent count, I like a 50 cal. revolver such as a Causall, or better yet, cap-and-ball with (pref. black powder) sub-sonic ammo, but this is a matter of taste, and many prefer other sidearms. I prefer a long barrel, it increases muzzle velocity, increases specificity, and my penis, 'though adequate for most of my uses, is average-sized. A bayonet, duct-tape, night vision, back-up gun. Here a quality derringer of large caliber maintains that ol' two-shot dissuasion.
Don't eat where you sleep. Wash after you eat, including your gob. Don't sleep near fish-guts. Generally, emulate our Arabian friends and wipe with the left, shake with the right. I mean, (try to) be aware like that. If you can shoot people who dynamite-fish, anti-freeze poison wildlife, modify ultimates like: 'very unique,' you should. If you are a liberal, you might also bring a slingshot to annoy the 'coons before exterminating them. Go ahead and bean anyone who refers to "Fine/Friendly Illinois People" (FIPs-FIBs) on their fluid-filled cabesas. Rest assured they are generally (universally) of too low a station to retain legal representation, making the likelihood of their effecting co-ordinated retaliation nearly as probable as Nathan losing a farting contest with a Hindu on the morning of 'sex-night.'
As far as that Iodine-diffusion (water-purification)crap, I would just use beasts of burden or porters to bring lots of gin and tonic and lime and ice. With the influx of minorities to the states, and a heads-up about the near term macro-economic picture from your MaMaw for your locale should allow you to retain the help you need for a pittance. Short people can do remarkably well on inclines, for example. Consult local ordinances on the use of rickshaws. If the economic picture darkens another shade, you may be able to exploit the Steinbeckian alternative of Milch-maids. Just a suggestion.
'limes' if you are going to the forest with CaOH, you are on a whole different form of family vacation.
sedan chair?
excellent.
x-acto knife (splinters, et c.).
super glue (field expedient sutures).
extra absorbent tampons (field expedient wound packing).
3 pair sterile latex gloves in individual packages (hard to wash your hands in the woods).
Oil of cloves (tooth aches).
Saline solution (eye/wound flushing).
Small bottle of grain alcohol.
First aid kits (and first aid kits only) should be housed in fluorescent yellow containers for easy location in an emergency.
One of those keychain LED lights that you squeeze to activate. "bite-lights"
Accidents are more likely to happen in the dark and you want a source of hands free light.
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